As you may know, I'm not jumping up and down because Trump won the nomination. But (A), let me reiterate a point I made in my tribute to Roy Thomas' historic WHAT IF? series of Marvel mags which you can still read at steveneisenpreis.blogspot.com : The people elected him president, and the people, ALL of the people, should put the vandalism, shouting, and signs aside and give him a chance, and (B) he DOES have a point.
The American publishing system is rigged.
THERE! I said it. In fact, it isn't even the American publishing system anymore. It's just an extension of the European publishing system, and not one of the editors or executives in charge of Hachette Book Group, Pearson Random House, or HarperCollins would know a great American book if it fell on top of their pointy little heads. If they're not rejecting books, they're ripping off the Melvilles, Wolfes, and Poes of the future by charging exorbitant rates JUST TO GET PUBLISHED!
With all that in mind, America, I give you...
STEVE'S PLAN TO MAKE AMERICA READ AGAIN (or, MAKE AMERICAN PUBLISHING GREAT AGAIN)
1. All European-based publishers will be forced to sell or spin off their American subsidiaries.
2. The term "self-publishing" as it currently exists will be replaced by "assisted publishing," and no author will have to pay more than $500 for the total cost of publishing
3. Any author who takes his manuscript to an establishment with a copier (i.e. a library, office superstore, or restaurant) and sells the finished product himself will now be considered a "self-publisher."
4. Authors will be required to guarantee satisfaction. Publishers will no longer send copies to reviewers, who will have to buy their own copies.
5.Rejected books will be treated the same as their published counterparts, including promotion as part of literacy campaigns.
6. Rejection itself would be eliminated, except when it comes to books advocating the violent overthrow of the United States of America.
7. Murder of iconic literary characters would be treated exactly the same as murder of actual people.
8. Editors will be stripped of their "life or death" power and serve as cheerleaders.
9. No book will be priced higher than five U,S, dollars.
Boy, it feels great to get THAT off my chest!
Happy Thanksgiving, and let's knock the stuffing out of those turkeys in charge of the book publishers!
Steve
Tuesday, November 22, 2016
Wednesday, November 2, 2016
What the Devil Is Mickey Doing THERE?
Halloween may be over, (And Election Day is on the way. Talk about SCARY!) but you can still have some scary good fun. You can either get ready for Marvel's new Doctor Strange movie by reading Stan Lee and Steve Ditko's early classics in DOCTOR STRANGE OMNIBUS VOL. 1 (available wherever books, ebooks. or graphic novels are sold), or (A) start saving those shekels, (B) write a letter to Santa or Harry, or (C) or go to http://www.papercutz.com to pre-order DISNEY GREAT PARODIES: MICKEY'S INFERNO before it ships next month.
I know what you're thinking: Walt is doing a three-sixty in his grave because the company he started with a Mouse has thrown the taste playbook right out the window. Well, nothing could be farther from the truth! Anybody who's seen the hilarious MICKEY MOUSE SHORTS on Disney Channel knows that although Mick comes from American roots, he can kick a soccer ball, shoot a hockey puck, (two of them, in fact, in the now-classic "Bad Ear Day") negotiate the tough Tokyo rush-hour traffic, navigate a gondola in Venice, save a cafe in Paris by delivering a motor-bike-load of croissants, drive a Formula 1 race car in the Monaco Grand Prix with the best of them and even entertain the Queen of England with his one man band, in short, M-I-C-K-E-Y is an M-O-U-S-E of the world, no matter what you may think. For years, Mickey and friends have been entertaining Italian audiences in what started as the Italian edition of MICKEY MOUSE MAGAZINE, I refer to TOPOLINO (literally, "Little Mouse") which is still published today. When TOPOLINO resumed publication after Mussolini and the rest of the Axis powers were defeated in WWII, one of the series within the magzine that were unique to Italy was "Great Parodies," which, as the name implies, featured Mousek-interpetations of classic works starring Mick and the gang, and the first (and, in this reviewer's humble opinion, the best) in the series, MICKEY'S INFERNO, which begins after Mickey and Goofy wow 'em in a performance of Dante's Divine Comedy. Mick's longtime enemy Peg-Leg Pete and his partner in crime Morty the Mesmerist hypnotize the Mouse and the Goof into thinking they are Dante and Virgil, respectively, and they take an imaginary journey to H-E-double-hockeysticks (This IS a Disney book I'm reviewing!) where they meet all sorts of creatures, some played by beloved fellow Disney characters! (Example, Minnie as Beatrice.) I read the preview that was offered free as part of Diamond Comics Distributors' national Halloween Comics Party, and it was very sophisticated without abandoning (hope of reading) the classic family-friendly humor that made Mickey famous. Mind you, it was excerpted, the complete under-the-bridge version ships in December and it's presented by Papercutz. a graphic novel publisher led by former self-admitted Marvel Zombie Slim Jim Salicrup, and noted for its variety of properties from the Smurfs and DreamWorks' TROLLS to Barbie and the WWE as well as its own great parodies of popular books and movies. It's one book Disneyphiles of all ages won't be able to put down, written in the classic (Dante)style and cleverly translated with tons of pop culture references. If you were down to your last and could only buy either this book or a sandwich, postponing that lunch and enjoying this book would be an absolute Mouseka-MUST! I'll bet that the shivers that run up and down your spine while reading this will be of absolute delight. When it goes on sale next month, run as Faust as you can to your local comic shop!
Seeya real soon!
Steve
IN A COMPLETELY UNRELATED DEVELOPMENT: Congratulations to the Chicago Cubs on breaking a 108-year-long drought and becoming Champions of Baseball!
I know what you're thinking: Walt is doing a three-sixty in his grave because the company he started with a Mouse has thrown the taste playbook right out the window. Well, nothing could be farther from the truth! Anybody who's seen the hilarious MICKEY MOUSE SHORTS on Disney Channel knows that although Mick comes from American roots, he can kick a soccer ball, shoot a hockey puck, (two of them, in fact, in the now-classic "Bad Ear Day") negotiate the tough Tokyo rush-hour traffic, navigate a gondola in Venice, save a cafe in Paris by delivering a motor-bike-load of croissants, drive a Formula 1 race car in the Monaco Grand Prix with the best of them and even entertain the Queen of England with his one man band, in short, M-I-C-K-E-Y is an M-O-U-S-E of the world, no matter what you may think. For years, Mickey and friends have been entertaining Italian audiences in what started as the Italian edition of MICKEY MOUSE MAGAZINE, I refer to TOPOLINO (literally, "Little Mouse") which is still published today. When TOPOLINO resumed publication after Mussolini and the rest of the Axis powers were defeated in WWII, one of the series within the magzine that were unique to Italy was "Great Parodies," which, as the name implies, featured Mousek-interpetations of classic works starring Mick and the gang, and the first (and, in this reviewer's humble opinion, the best) in the series, MICKEY'S INFERNO, which begins after Mickey and Goofy wow 'em in a performance of Dante's Divine Comedy. Mick's longtime enemy Peg-Leg Pete and his partner in crime Morty the Mesmerist hypnotize the Mouse and the Goof into thinking they are Dante and Virgil, respectively, and they take an imaginary journey to H-E-double-hockeysticks (This IS a Disney book I'm reviewing!) where they meet all sorts of creatures, some played by beloved fellow Disney characters! (Example, Minnie as Beatrice.) I read the preview that was offered free as part of Diamond Comics Distributors' national Halloween Comics Party, and it was very sophisticated without abandoning (hope of reading) the classic family-friendly humor that made Mickey famous. Mind you, it was excerpted, the complete under-the-bridge version ships in December and it's presented by Papercutz. a graphic novel publisher led by former self-admitted Marvel Zombie Slim Jim Salicrup, and noted for its variety of properties from the Smurfs and DreamWorks' TROLLS to Barbie and the WWE as well as its own great parodies of popular books and movies. It's one book Disneyphiles of all ages won't be able to put down, written in the classic (Dante)style and cleverly translated with tons of pop culture references. If you were down to your last and could only buy either this book or a sandwich, postponing that lunch and enjoying this book would be an absolute Mouseka-MUST! I'll bet that the shivers that run up and down your spine while reading this will be of absolute delight. When it goes on sale next month, run as Faust as you can to your local comic shop!
Seeya real soon!
Steve
IN A COMPLETELY UNRELATED DEVELOPMENT: Congratulations to the Chicago Cubs on breaking a 108-year-long drought and becoming Champions of Baseball!
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